No, not a PDF, if you don’t know how to open one of those, well, just double click on the file, and if you don’t have Adobe Reader you can download it for free. Now, back to what matters: Public Displays of Affection. A controversial, but necessary conversation you will have to have with the man you are dating. You hear all the time that times are changing, but are they really? For some of you across the world, holding hands with your partner, lover or boyfriend isn’t even an option. So, you might be thinking, well I am in America, so I am going to hold the fuck out of my boyfriend’s hand and exercise my homosexual equal rights. It goes on and on and on… But let me ask this: If you are at say, Disneyland, and you are holding hands around thousands of people, and hundreds of kids, is it appropriate? Like, if a Mormon family is visiting from Utah, and their kids have never really been exposed to the LGBT community, should their first time be at Disneyland? Don’t get defensive, if you are thinking well straight people aren’t considerate of my views on life, why should I be considerate of theirs? That’s good, fuel fire with fire, which sometimes is appropriate. But we are talking about public displays of affection, not who is right or wrong.
I guess we should talk about where, when and how much PDA is appropriate and when. Recently, at a very public, very family, child friendly place, there were two very young gay boys making out. Basically, it looks like they were going at it. For a second I tried justifying the situation by saying, they are kids and don’t know better, and that I am old, maybe conservative, and slightly Victorian. THEN, it really hit me that I would be grossed out if straight kids were doing it. So, I wasn’t being prejudiced, or old.
Then, on a date with a guy, and a bunch of friends around 11pm, we were walking out of this restaurant and bar, and as I went to squeeze his hand and he pulled away fast and said, “I don’t do all that.” For a second I was understanding, justifying fear, shame and maybe even a little bit of nervousness. I decided that this guy was not right for me, and that I didn’t have time to deal with all of those suppressed problems. (And no, it wasn’t about clean hands, because before we left I stopped in the bathroom to wash my hands, and fix my hair.)
These experiences were all fairly recent, and I think wow this is 2014, I should be exiled with the guy I am with to gay bars or feel like we are under house arrest. So, after consulting with my friends, here are little did bits into the world of PDAs: